christmas

3 Must Watch Holiday Classics for 2022

December 21, 2022 by William Mapp Leave a Comment

Christmas is a time for gathering around the TV and watching movies that bring out the best in holiday spirit. You can’t have Christmas without these movies and you should make an effort to see each one of these fine films before December 26th. Don’t let the Scrooges ruin your holiday thirst for violence and gunplay. Each one of these cinematic greats teaches us the true meaning of Christmas.

Grab your popcorn, load up your egg nog with Uncle Nearest’s new Rye blend, and get to streaming!

You Can Get This Poster from Pizza Party Printing When It’s Back in Stock

The Long Kiss Goodnight

Samuel L. Jackson, Geena Davis, espionage, and superior gun play round out this holiday classic. Geena Davis plays mild mannered, amnesiac, Pennsylvania school teacher, Samantha Caine. One day, after a car accident, Sam starts having flashbacks to her previous life being a CIA agent. Just in time, Mitch, played by Samuel L. ‘Muthafucka’ Jackson, a private investigator Samantha hired to sort through her mysterious past has dug up details about her super secret agent past life as Charlene ‘Charly’ Baltimore (not the rapper).

Bullets fly, car chases ensue, and explosions cap off a true holiday movie set in Pennsylvania, during Christmas time. The movie ends with Samantha/Charly’s family getting back together, Mitch finding his time in the limelight, and Americans protected from an internal terrorist threat.

The Long Kiss Goodnight is streaming on Roku, Paramount+, Prime, Showtime, and Apple+.

Lethal Weapon

One of my family’s Christmas Eve traditions is the Mapp Family Holiday Lasagna. Lethal Weapon 1, was the flick of choice during last year’s meal preparation. You see, the Holiday Lasagna is a labor of love and takes a full hour of preparation followed by baking time, then cooling time to let all of the flavors settle. Lethal Weapon stars Danny Glover who plays an LA police office 30 years older than his real age, and Mel Gibson before we knew who he really was. The 1 hour and 57 minutes of catchy one liners between Sgt. Murtah and Sgt. Riggs, sirens, and gun play against a Los Angeles backdrop at Christmas time is a family-friendly fun ride. These movies are a case study in buddy cop action dramas and you will not be disappointed to watch Lethal Weapon cuddled up with you loved ones.

Lethal Weapon is streaming on Hulu, Prime, Roku, and Apple+.

Die Hards 1 and 2

It goes without saying, regardless of what my wife, the Blerdmom, says about Die Hard, it is in fact a Christmas movie. It has all of the elements of White Christmas and other holiday movies. The protagonists have to travel to see loved ones and others they care about. Conflict between the protagonists resolves over the yule tide spirit. Bad guys and spoiler elements are disrupted through constant vigilance in the belief of Christmas magic. And, a skydive off of a skyscraper just as a helicopter explodes on the roof. Die Hards 1 and 2 are must see films for the Christmas season. There’s something for everyone in both movies. Humor, comedic and dark, family love and affection, and gifts. Cash or otherwise.

Die Hard stars none other, than the-man-who-knows-how-to-kill-someone, Bruce Willis the former leading man of Moonlighting. Naysayers will hate on you for calling Die Hard, and Die Hard 2 Christmas films, but you can’t help but witness the Christmas everywhere in the movie.

Die Hard is such a great Christmas movie, I mysteriously receive anonymous Christmas cards from a fellow Die Hard fan each year. (This year, one came from Ellis)

Die Hard is streaming on Starz, and the Starz Amazon Channel.

For all you haters, here’s the Die Hard Christmas Trailer

Honorable Mention

Gremlins

Gremlins is about a struggling inventor trying to hock his wares in Japan only to fail. Before leaving for home, he forgot to pick up his son, Billy, a Christmas gift. So he steps into a whole in wall, antique store and buys a cute, furry creature called Gizmo. The little mogwai, demon, can’t stay up late, should never get wet, and most importantly, never eat after midnight. The inventor, Randall Peltzer, buys the mogwai and somehow gets it past US Customs. Back home, Randall eerily repeats the rules to his teenaged son, and what do you know he breaks all of them. He lets Gizmo stay up late watching TV, and the fool gets the little fuzzbugger wet. After Gizmo gets wet, he multiplies several other furry mogwai who make a mess of his house. And of course, Billy lets them eat after midnight, and the mogwais wage havoc on Billy’s small town on Christmas Even.

Gremlins is a for real classic. It’s a great movie that epitomizes the dark comedy horror genre, and plenty of plot elements make it a Christmas movie worth watching. Sit down with a warm cocoa and watch little demons terrorize a town. The chair escalator scene will never be forgotten.

Gremlins is streaming, hopefully still streaming, on HBO Max.

Have a very Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year!

The Best Egg Nog You’ll Ever Drink

December 14, 2022 by William Mapp Leave a Comment

Egg Nog is my Christmas holiday guilty pleasure. I can’t get enough of the stuff in the days leading up to and after Christmas. And I only drink it at Christmas. My recipe is an adaptation of Martha Stewart’s booze heavy elixir and Alton Brown’s Scientifically Sound Serum.

Tweaks

Instead of hand grated cinnamon, Penny’s Cinnamon Tung Hing is a game changer. Sabrina Mapp’s homemade, Bulleit bourbon vanilla is the jam. Her Sri Lankan vanilla beans have been steeping for over a year.

Per usual, here we go.

Tools

A stand mixer
A Microplane hand held grater
A rubber spatula
A metal spoon
A glass, half-gallon sized jar with rubber seal

Ingredients

A nutmeg seed
Tung Hing Cinnamon to taste
1 Teaspoon Real vanilla extract
7 Egg Yolks
1 Cup of Sugar
A pinch of salt
1 Pint heavy whipping cream
1 Pint half and half
1 Cup of Uncle Nearest 1856
0.5 Cups of Vanilla Infused Bourbon
0.5 Cups of Cognac
1 Cup of Dark Spiced Rum

The Method

Freeze the stand mixer’s whisk attachment and bowl until they’re really cold.
In the meantime separate the yolks from the egg whites. If you don’t want to age the nog, you can whip the whites with sugar and make a meringue fluff to top the eggnog.
Using your microplane, grind the nutmeg seed until you have enough nutmeg to flavor your nog. You can grate it in a dish or bowl, or whatever you have to hold it. The nutmeg amount is a matter of preference, so grate enough to taste.
Using your microplane, grind the cinnamon stick into the same bowl or dish as the nutmeg for your flavor profile.
Take the stand mixer’s bowl and whisk attachment out of the freezer and attach them to the mixer.
Dump the egg yolks in the bowl.
Dump the sugar on top of the egg yolks.
Pinch the salt in with the yolks and sugar.
Dump the ground nutmeg and cinnamon in with the yolks and sugar.
Start the stand mixer by setting it to its lowest setting. You will cream (there’s a funny chef meme out there) the sugar and egg yolks for a long time.
Cream the sugar/yolk mix until the yellow yolky color lightens and when you stop the mixer and lift the whisk, the yolks form a ribbon like stream from the whisk. It will be speckled because you’ve whisked the yolks with nutmeg and cinnamon.
Restart the mixer and continue whisking for some more time.
Add the vanilla extract.
Increase the whisk speed to low/medium speed. The yolk mixer will thicken because more air is being added to the mix.
Stop the mixer. Using the rubber spatula scrap any excess creamed yolk from the sides of the bowl.
Restart the mixer on a low speed, we don’t want these ingredients splashing out of the bowl.
Now, add the pint of whipping cream. Let the mixer whisk for a little longer. Do not whisk for too long. You’re not trying to make eggnog fluff.
Add the half and half. The mixture should thin out now and you should be watching your eggnog mixture slosh around. It’s a little thick, this is okay. Just watch it for a moment or two.
Add the dark rum. Watch the mixture slosh around. The color will darken to a rich, eggnog like, color.
Add the cognac. Mixture is thinning some more.
Add the brandy. Mixture is even thinner.
Take a swig of the Uncle Nearest.
Pour the rest of in the bowl.
Let the mixer slosh all of the ingredients around for a bit.
Stop the mixer.
Stir the mixture using your spoon. Make sure you scrape the bottom some stand mixers find it hard to reach. Look at how your egg nog slides off of the back of the spoon.
Is your egg nog…right? Do you need more whiskey? If so, take a sip and add a sip.
Restart the mixer. Just let the stuff mix for a while. Listen to a couple of Christmas songs.
Stop the mixer, and stir using your spoon.
Empty the bowl into a glass jar with seal. Place the jar IN THE BACK OF THE FRIDGE.
Wait for Christmas.

The 2022 Annual Gift Guide

December 14, 2022 by William Mapp Leave a Comment

Happy Holidays and Seasons Greetings, fans.

It’s Thursday and it’s time for another tech news dispatch. It’s the last show of the year with Mark Starling and First News 570. This week is all about the best gadgets to grab for this holiday season and the top 5 picks are some of the best of the best of Gift Guides’ Past.

You can check out all of the gifts on this year’s gift guide on Pinterest.

ANKER’S POCKET HOME THEATRE

We kicked off this year’s Gift Guide with the Anker Nebula Apollo. There are more expensive mini-home theaters, as well as cheaper alternatives, but at a price $300 the Nebula Apollo fits squarely in the middle. This portable device makes having a big screen experience easy. You can plug in a laptop using the HDMI port or stream to it using WiFi. The picture won’t be full on HD, but you’re not really shooting for that on a white wall. Pair this with a decent BlueTooth or portable speaker setup and you’ve turned a dorm, outdoor screen, or hot tub into a venue for movie night.

BALMUDA SMART SPEAKER

Most consumer electronics comes in a shiny black box without much thought given to its design. You have to spend big money in order to get a halfway decent looking piece of gear. Balmuda is trying to change the way people perceive audio electronics with 360 degrees of sound with its Smart Speaker. The Balmuda Smart Speaker looks great and sounds great with vacuum tube looking adornments that pulse with the music. Speak provides deep space and can connect using HDMI or BlueTooth. This speaker, plus Anker’s project are a perfectly stylish portable min-theater rig.

RAY BAN SMART SHADES

The Ray-Ban Smart Wayfarer shades aren’t the first smart shade offerings on the market. Oakley and BOSE have released smart shades that play music and see, but the Smart Wayfarers are the best looking. A tiny camera is implanted at the frame and can be used to capture stories, video, or snap pictures. Smart sunglasses are a controversial technology and that hasn’t changed. The controversy comes in its near anonymous use of camera technology. The social rules governing personal spying versus documenting life haven’t been answered. There’s a very real possibility of being leered at by the person wearing these.

A MASSAGE WHEN AND WHERE YOU WANT IT

I work in tech. I sit at a desk all day in the same position, and after doing that days on end my neck and my back are sore. What’s better than a spouse’s massage? Paying a massage therapist? Of course. But what if you can’t get that on the regular? Enter the Venom Go, attachable massager. The Venom Go applies heat and pressure where you need it and uses a specially design fabric so the massage adheres to the skin. You need your pecs pelted. Venom Go. Need your trapezius trembled. Venom Go. Need your back beat up. Venn Go.

COURANT CATCH CHARGING PAD

I can’t believe I’m doing this. I’m adding a wireless charging pad to the Annual Gift Guide. This happens to be fancy and useful pad. Charge your iPhone or Android device on the flat side of the pad. Throw your watch, mood ring, and other stuff in the tray side of the charger along with your change. The tray side expands the device to allowing you to charge all the other non-flat components while being a place hold lint while charging the rest of your stuff.

Thanks!

Thanks for sticking with me for another year. This year has been a gut check on many levels, but I find myself one week away from Christmas in a much more secure place without the old monkey on my back, but in a better position for the future.

Thank you for subscribing to Tech News Dispatch, the Cloud Podcast, and for buying my books. Those Amazon royalties aren’t much, but there are delightful to receive.

Have a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year!

LET's GET STARTED AND

MAKE TECHNOLOGY WORK FOR YOU